Serial liar Michael Cohen may have again perjured himself in front of Congress with his ballyhooed testimony back in February but he is making Democrats an offer that they won’t be able to refuse.
With the Russian collusion dream having been rudely snuffed out by special counsel Robert Mueller and House Dems desperate for anything to fuel their ongoing witch hunt against President Trump, the discredited and disbarred attorney is promising to deliver the motherlode if he can put off his reporting date to the country club prison that he is heading for.
In a letter to Democrats, Cohen’s lawyer and Clinton crime family consigliere Lanny Davis proposed that his client was prepared to provide “over 14 million files” that were only recently discovered in exchange for a get out of jail free card.
That the self-motivated snitch has already humiliated them twice with his prevarications and mastery of the fine art of fibbery would normally give pause to rational people but these are the Democrats and with Jerrold Nadler playing the role of Captain Ahab on an obsessive quest to get that damned whale, they will almost certainly jump at the offer to once again feature this scoundrel as their star witness.
First on CNN: President Trump’s former lawyer & fixer Michael Cohen is offering House Democrats new information in a bid to stay out of jail, telling Congress he’s accessed more documents & offering new assistance to investigators. @PamelaBrownCNN reports. https://t.co/smZDROldaW pic.twitter.com/sszOyLLL8z
— The Situation Room (@CNNSitRoom) 4 апреля 2019 г.
Michael Cohen is making a last-ditch effort to delay his prison sentence, writing to congressional Democrats to help him stay out of prison in exchange for help in their investigations.
Lawyers for Cohen, President Donald Trump’s former personal lawyer and fixer, wrote to congressional Democrats on Thursday that their client recently gained access to files seized in a highly publicized FBI raid in 2018 and that he could provide further insights to help in their investigations into Trump’s affairs. The files include more than 14 million documents, the lawyers write, and Cohen would need substantial time to sift through them and make them useful to lawmakers.
Cohen is due to start his prison sentence in May after pleading guilty to a litany of crimes in Washington and New York.
Cohen’s lawyers also asked Democrats to attest that Cohen has been a helpful witness in their investigations into Trump’s dealings.
His lawyers hoped the endorsement from members of Congress could convince federal prosecutors in Manhattan that Cohen is necessary for their investigations, prompting a delayed and reduced sentence.
Congress will definitely deliver the hoped-for endorsements to the SDNY simply because their hatred for Trump is so intense that they would probably also sell their own grandchildren into sex slavery were it to advance their jihad to impeach the duly elected president.
Given their complete abrogation of any semblance of moral conduct, expect Nadler, Adam Schiff, Elijah Cummings and the rest of the mob to take Cohen up on his offer and to wine and dine him in high style with taxpayers footing the bill.
Navy Blue Trump 2020 Hat – 33% Off And FREE Shipping
Cohen’s best BFF is so impressed that took to his Twitter account to send a missive to his lunatic fringe prowling followers:
Last weekend I flew to New York City to catch up with and thank Michael Cohen. He has a ton of new Trump material to share was congressional investigators. He has illegal business activity. He has crazy insane stuff. Michael is a meticulous note taker and impeccable with his word pic.twitter.com/TNEFN5UWtt
— Tom Arnold (@TomArnold) 5 апреля 2019 г.
That’s right. Roseanne Barr’s weirdo ex-husband Tom Arnold who once played a character named Stanley Stupid in the iconic cultural classic The Stupids broke bread with the cheese-eating rat who he praised as being “impeccable with his word” – that is when it doesn’t involve snitching on his clients.
But not everyone is impressed with this epically scummy deal from Cohen and Davis; MSNBC’s Chris Hayes who has spent over two years peddling zany conspiracy theories balked:
This is ludicrously shady even by Michael Cohen and Trumpworld standards. https://t.co/xbQGCeTThr
— Chris Hayes (@chrislhayes) 4 апреля 2019 г.
But the diehards, celebs, and Trump hating media activists will be all over this like junkies desperately needing another hit off of the conspiracy crack pipe.
Just wait and see…